This was inspired by a similar list a man made picking at some of his own denomination’s quirks. It is, of course, meant in all good humor, because if we can’t laugh at ourselves, we sure shouldn’t be laughing at anyone else!
10. It was a wide road. He only crosses narrow paths.
9. The road was under construction, which means it must be a new road. New roads are an innovation of man and cannot be trusted.
8. A Baptist crossed the road, so he will wait 20-30 years, unveil his road-crossing plan during an elders/deacons planning session as though it’s a new idea, and then cross the road. (Liberal!)
7. The road was a two-way street. He knows the real road is one-way.
6. He could hear Sandy Patty singing with instruments on the other side of the road.
5. The crossing guard was a woman, and he didn’t want his road-crossing authority usurped.
4. There’s a pond on his side of the road, and only a lawn sprinkler on the other. Clearly, he’s already on the right side of the road.
3. He’s still waiting for the sixth verse of “Just As I Am.”
2. Crossing roads is not authorized by any NT passage.
1. He chose to mail a correspondence course to the other side instead.